Have a Heart!
July 3, 2013 Comments Off on Have a Heart!
I have been experiencing pain of varying degrees in my chest for some years. It disappears when I love, when I melt….
It is not physical; it is certainly concerned with relaxation, total melting, forgetting oneself completely. In those moments it disappears, so certainly it is not physical. You have to learn to give more love. This is not only your problem; in varying degrees it is the problem of everybody.
Everybody wants to be loved; that is a wrong beginning.
It starts because the child, the small child, cannot love, cannot say anything, cannot do anything, cannot give anything; he can only get. A small child’s experience of love is of getting: getting from the mother, getting from the father, getting from brothers, sisters, getting from guests, strangers – but always getting. So the first experience that settles deep in his unconscious is that he has to get love.
But the trouble arises because everybody has been a child, and everybody has the same urge to get love; nobody is born in any other way. So all are asking, “Give us love,” and there is nobody to give because the other person was also brought up in the same way.
One has to be alert and aware that just an incident of birth should not remain a constant prevailing state of your mind.
Rather than asking, “Give me love,” start giving love. Forget about getting, simply give – and I guarantee you, you will get much.
But you are not to think about getting. You are not even indirectly, by the side, to watch whether you are getting it or not. That much will be enough disturbance. You simply give, because to give love is so beautiful that getting love is not so great. This is one of the secrets.
Giving love is the really beautiful experience, because then you are an emperor. Getting love is very small experience, and it is the experience of a beggar. Don’t be a beggar. At least as far as love is concerned, be an emperor, because it is an inexhaustible quality in you. You can go on giving as much as you like. Don’t be worried that it will be exhausted, that one day you will suddenly find, “My God! I don’t have any love to give anymore.”
Love is not a quantity; it is a quality, and a quality of a certain category that grows by giving and dies if you hold it. If you are miserly about it, it dies. So be really spendthrift. Don’t bother to whom – that is really the idea of a miserly mind: I will give love to certain persons with certain qualities. You don’t understand that you have so much…you are a raincloud.
The raincloud does not bother where it rains – on the rocks, in the gardens, in the ocean – it doesn’t matter. It wants to unburden itself. And that unburdening is a tremendous relief.
So the first secret is: Don’t ask for it, and don’t wait, thinking that you will give if somebody asks you. Give it!
Just give your love to anybody – a stranger. It is not a question that you have to give something very valuable, just a helping hand and that will be enough. In twenty-four hours, whatever you do should be done with love, and the pain in your heart will disappear. And because you will be so loving, people will love you. It is a natural law. You get what you give. In fact you get more than you give.
Learn giving, and you will find so many people being loving towards you who had never looked at you, who had never bothered about you. Your problem is that you have a heart full of love but you have been a miser; that love has become a burden on the heart. Rather than making the heart blossom you have been hoarding it, so once in a while when you are in a moment of love you feel it disappearing. But why one moment? Why not every moment?
It is not even a question of a living being. You can touch this chair with a loving hand. The thing depends on you, not on the object.
Then you will find a great relaxation and a great disappearance of your self – which is a burden – and a melting into the whole.
This is certainly a disease, in the literal meaning of the word: it is a dis-ease. It is not sickness, so no physician can help you. It is simply a tense state of your heart that just wants to give more and more. Perhaps you have more love than other people, perhaps you are more fortunate, and you are making out of your fortune a great misery for yourself. Share it, without bothering to whom you are giving.
Just give it, and you will find tremendous peace and silence. This will become your meditation.
One can come to meditation through many directions; perhaps this is going to be your direction.
Osho, Beyond Psychology, Talk #41
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